Sports represent the passion and illusion of many children around the world. The possibility of becoming a great athlete like Cristiano Ronaldo, Rafael Nadal or Lionel Messi is something many of us have dreamed of in our childhood.
In addition, practicing sports is a healthy activity that allows children and teenagers to develop certain qualities and maintain an active and healthy routine for them.
However, beyond all the illusion and excitement, it may happen that a child may not be good enough for the sport he or she likes so much.
In a Soccer camp, for example, it’s normal at a young age for children to unconsciously compare their performance to that of their teammates, as most of them want to stand out and become the star of the team.
This kind of behavior can affect children’s mental health if there’s no good support and help from parents. In addition, it can generate other social problems, mistrust and much more.
For all these reasons, in this post we will talk about how and when a child should make the decision to quit a sport.
How can you tell if quitting sports is right for your kid?
The first thing to be clear about is that this is a very personal decision. Each person has his or her own personality and approaches life situations in different ways.
To know for sure if it’s the right time to give up a sport, you should avoid any kind of comparison and look at the pros and cons of the situation for your child.
Of course, the doubt arises when the child is having a hard time or simply doesn’t feel like continuing to practice.
Before making such a drastic decision as quitting, you must discover the real reason for the child’s rejection of the sport. If it’s purely a sporting issue, the situation should have a further analysis.
On the other hand, if the situation has to do with the social aspect or the relationship with teammates and coaches, the problem should be approached from another point of view.
Talk to your child to discover the reasons for his or her dissatisfaction
The best way to approach the problem is to talk directly to your child, offering yourself as an unconditional support for his or her needs.
Make your child understand that he or she can tell you about problems and that you will be there to advise and solve all complications.
If the problem is social, relationships with their teammates, coaches or simply the pressure they feel when playing; you can help from the psychological aspect to try to improve their leadership skills and increase their understanding of the world as a community that encompasses us all.
You can try to talk to the coaches about having a different approach with your child to embrace motivation. However, this solution is not as viable in academies, Soccer camps or massively group training sessions.
On the other hand, if the problem is purely performance related, it’s time to balance how beneficial it may be for your child to keep trying to improve in that sport or simply accept that he/she does not have the qualities to perform well.
At this point we must be very careful because the message of giving up against adversity can be very damaging to their mental health. What we all want as parents is for our children to be able to do everything they dream of, of course, but sometimes we also have to bring them to reality in the most subtle and intelligent way possible, so that they can maintain a high self-esteem.
Therefore, it’s important to know how much effort has been made to practice this sport. If your child can still give more of himself/herself and prove to himself/herself that he is capable of doing it; or if it is time to give up because the situation has overtaken him or her.
When is too soon to quit?
Determining whether it is too early to quit a sport can be complicated. However, the process is made easier if a few variables are taken into account.
- Honest analysis of his or her abilities: Review your child’s capabilities from an honest point of view and analyze whether they have a high or low margin for improvement if they slightly increase their effort in training.
- Evaluate effort and mentality: Review the amount of effort and energy your child expends in training. Consider whether he/she has already done his/her best or if with a little more motivation he/she can perform better.
- Quantify how long he or she has been playing the sport: Giving up a sport after only one or two weeks of practice can be hasty. However, if it’s been 3, 4 or 6 months and your child still doesn’t feel comfortable, it may be time to quit.
- Balance the possible negative consequences: Telling your child to give up when he or she has the illusion of becoming a great player can be very difficult. Before seriously considering it, first suggest the idea to see how he feels about it and whether he is willing to quit.
- Observe how much motivation he has to train and play: As a last point, it is convenient to review your child’s motivation. There is no point in continuing to do an activity that you don’t really want to do. If your child has had enough of the sport and is simply not excited about it, it may be time to take a step back.
What to do after your kid has quitted?
The most important thing after your child has quit a sport is to keep his or her confidence high so that he or she will be motivated to do other activities.
As a parent, your duty is to make your child see that there are many other alternatives in life. Show them other types of disciplines and hobbies that they can also practice on a weekly basis.
You can take a period of rest to regain strength and analyze if there really is another sport or activity that your child wants to practice. It is key at this point that you do not put too much pressure on them, as this can end up demotivating them even more.
Of course, if your child is sad or discouraged, you can always plan a trip to a place they really like or give them a gift that can help them overcome their disappointment.
The message parents should give their child after quitting a sport is that life goes on and they will have many more opportunities to prove themselves in the future.
Whether in sports or in other areas, a person’s worth is not defined by their skills in a certain sport, but by their ability to pick themselves up in the face of difficult situations and their conviction to keep going.
How to recover your kid’s confidence?
It is normal after quitting a sport for your child to feel a strong sense of frustration. However, that frustration can be reversed and turned into motivation if you can focus that energy from a positive point of view.
Be sure to show him/her other disciplines that can get his/her attention. For example, if you see that he/she has always liked swimming pools, you can suggest that he/she start doing water sports at the nearest school.
If he has a friend who likes basketball, you can try enrolling him/her in that same academy for a few days to see if he/she likes the sport.
There are many ways to help your child regain confidence. It is important to note that quitting a sport does not mean that he/she has failed.
Losses are part of life. In fact, professional athletes often lose far more than they win over the course of their careers.
Basketball player Giannis Antetokounmpo himself commented on this at a press conference. There is no failure in sport, it’s all part of the path each person takes to success.
Not being good enough at a sport is not the end of the world. As time goes by, you will surely find that discipline or that area where you really excel and can feel great about yourself.
Conclusion
Giving up a sport can be a complicated decision that can have negative consequences for children. However, with the support of their parents and a positive approach, the risk of negatively affecting their mental health can be reduced.
Before quitting a sport, the following topics should be taken into account:
- It is a very personal situation, avoid comparing your child’s case with that of other children.
- Analyze their performance and social relationships at the academy.
- Observe his motivation to continue before making a decision.
- Consider if he has room for improvement or if he has already given his best.
- Look for other disciplines that can help him regain his confidence.
- Avoid the word failure and let him understand that he will have other opportunities to succeed.